Boston turned 9 months old. I'm still working the two part time jobs and its rough. There's no break. I worked, I think about 3 weeks straight without a full day off. Yes, sometimes my shift was only 4 hours but that kind of ruins the day. Plus a lot of the time I'm not home at night so I don't get to put Boston to sleep and all that stuff. I feel like I miss so much. I hate it. Hopefully, either one job goes full time or I can find something else that is normal hours. At this point I don't REALLY care what the job is (as long as I'm not cleaning toilets or McDonalds or something like that), I just want something that I can function a lil better with.
Jon's mom, step-dad, and his daughter Madison came to visit. His parents only stayed for the weekend and Madison stayed that whole week. We celebrated Father's Day while she was here. I took her and Boston to Portrait Innovations and had their pictures taken together for a surprise present for Jon. It is such a cute picture! They look a lot alike! Madison loves her little brother. She also loves our puppy, Tippy. It was stressful having all of them there and taking care of Boston and I ended up pretty much taking care of Madison too. I'll stop that line of thinking before I get upset and start rambling...
Here they are! Soooo cute, both of them!
They're not related at all!
They're not related at all!We did a lot of fun things while she was here. The Zoo, Monkey Joes, Incredible Pizza Company, Science Center, I-Cubs game, Arts Festival, swimming. The kids went with my parents to a Father's Day picnic (Jon and I had to work). Love it when she's here but its rough taking care of one kid and working two jobs let alone TWO kids and two jobs. And once again....felt like I was the one doing all the work. BUT we'll let that go for now...
Friday before Madison left I had to work. We all went to the Arts Festival, it was a very nice day out and we saw a lot of cool things. Poor Bos, either has allergies of I got a lot of sunscreen in his eyes. Probably the sunscreen. But his eyes were watering and red and he looked miserable, kinda like he was when we went to Tulip Time. I felt horrible for him but he still acted just fine! Once we got home Boston was hot an tired and his poor eyes! I put him down for a nap and went to work. I got a text from Jon about 7 saying "Call Me!!" And of course, I panic! I call and he tells me Boston seems to be having a hard time breathing and he's coughing and snotty and his eyes are red and he just looks and seems horrible. So, since men can't figure things out on their own, I had to leave work. I left went and picked everyone up and went to the walk-in clinic. Turns out he had gotten pink-eye and they thought or figured he just had allergies. So, they prescribed eye drops and said to get some Zyrtec. Alright. You're the Doctor...
I had to work Saturday night and Jon took Madison to meet her mom to take her back home. He brought Boston with him, which I felt bad because the poor guy still looked like he felt horrible. I guess the trip went fine though. Me, I was itching to get out of the house, by myself and relax a little. Holly was at her friend Nicoles house, I told her I'd be there after I got off work which was around 10pm. I let Jon know, no biggy...right? You'd think. Well, when I got there Holly wasn't quite done, she wanted to finish her bottle of wine. Fine. I don't care. So I grabbed a beer while I waited. I ended up having two. OH NO!! Anyways, I got home and Jon was a little miffed. This seemingly innocent and tiny venture...ended up with me now staying at my parents. We got in a huge fight where I, once again, told him I didn't want to be with him anymore and him asking me why 400 times. Then some name calling on his side (I managed to hold my tongue...shocker, I know). Then after some more choice words I had had enough. I started packing the essentials and packing Boston's essentials and woke him up and left. Jon tried to get me to stay but I wasn't having it. I refuse to live through that crap anymore. I'm just unhappy and its my turn to think about me instead of thinking about him and whether or not HE'S happy, whether or not HIS daughter is taken care of, whether or not HIS bills are paid. IT'S MY TURN!! Call me selfish, call me self-centered, call me immoral...call me whatever the hell you want. I'm tired of living that way and am not going to do it anymore.
I just have to keep telling myself that someday Boston will understand and that my being happy will enable me to be a better mother.
That was Saturday night. Sunday morning I was supposed to take Boston to Jessica's so she could watch him while I was at work. My parents were out of town. Well, Boston still wasn't looking to good. I was a little worried that there was something else that was going on other than allergies and pink eye. So, instead of risking it and getting Presley sick too I took Boston into the walk-in clinic again. This time the doctor actually checked him out a little better than the first doctor did. And what did he find?!.....DOUBLE ear infection! Greaaaaaat! So, needless to say I didn't go to work that day. That doc also gave Boston some different drop for the pink eye because apparently the ones the other doc gave him, sting your eyes. Why would you give those drops to a baby?! I'm a little irritated by that doctors office.
Anyways, its now Tuesday...a week later. I've informed Jon that he can see and be with his son whenever he wants. But...he hasn't seen him since LAST Wednesday. He had all Friday and Saturday off. There is no reason he couldn't have come and gotten his son and spent the day with him. I don't know if he think this hurts ME or what the deal is. But its only hurting his son and it makes me EXTREMELY sad. We've worked together since this happened and he doens't even ask about him. Nothin'. It's heartbreaking...
I think that is going to be my stopping point...
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